Day 344 from insecurity to Self-Authority

Miranda-Authority

In the past couple of months I ended up in situations with people where I didn’t know what to do. I didn’t know how to handle the situations and moments in an effective way. What I was aware of was my reaction to it; where I knew that it wasn’t best to become emotional but I simply didn’t know what else to do. I froze and this activated insecurity within me where I felt powerless, making myself smaller and the other person superior where I had to stop myself from going into victimization where I would give the other person too much power.

I contacted someone to discuss this point and in the feedback I received they mentioned the word ‘authority’.  This word resonated immediately within me as the support that I needed in these specific moments/situations.

I have to become my own authority where it’s not about going into superiority, but to assist and support myself in my change to stand as an authority inside myself and so can direct situations much more effectively. The word authority will assist me to -slowly but surely- walk myself through the process from insecurity to live Self-Authority.

The solution for me to move through moments of insecurity is to slow down myself, assist myself to go into breathing until I am grounded and stable. Then I can take in the situation, consider other people who are involved, walk through every detail so I can make an informed decision of how this point can be resolved.

For me it’s crucial to take others into consideration who are involved; where they are, can they handle reality? My own position and responsibility, because if I don’t do this, it’s easy to go into blame and judgments towards the other and into fight or flight mode. I then stay part of the problem and not the solution.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to go into insecurity in moments/situations where I don’t know what to do.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to see insecurity as being weak.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to freeze in moments where I don’t know what to do.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to feel powerless as a result of fear when not knowing what to do.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to make myself smaller and others superior as a result of my insecurity.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to want to go into victimization when I make myself smaller and the other superior.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see the words ‘ see cure’ in ‘insecurity’ which helps me to ‘see the cure’ as in a specific living word that supports me to change myself in the process from being insecure to live Self-Authority.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to disempower myself as a result of feeling insecure and to not see, realize and understand that I can assist myself with a specific word that will help me move through moments of insecurity.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not slow down and ground myself when I don’t know what to do and to not take in all the information/details of the point/situation/moment to walk through effectively.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not take into consideration where the other person is, and therefore go into blame and judgment and fight and flight mode where I know I stay part of the problem and not the solution.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to stay part of the problem and not the solution which is not what is best for all in the situation.

When and as I am aware of me becoming insecure in a moment or situation that’s new for me and I don’t know what to do, I will slow myself down by breathing, until I am stable, grounded, Here again.  I realize that when I am stable and calm, I can take in all the information, details, consider others that are involved and commit myself to make an informed decision to walk through a moment or situation into the best solution for all.

I commit myself to see, realize and understand that Self-Authority is a gift that will come, a new Self-Expression that will emerge if I stand by myself in my process of change.