As we all have to make decisions in our lives, I have found out that sometimes I can make them in an absolute certainty; I know what I want, or not. It’s clear and solid to me and if feels natural.
When I look back in my life (especially in my teenage years), at the decisions I have said ‘yes’ to in an absolute certainty, those where the decisions were I have learned most about myself or I expanded myself through strengthing my talents or developing new skills.
However, nowadays, I am sometimes confronted with situations where I freeze within myself when I have to make a decision. What’s behind it is fear, the fear of having to make a choice. At the moment for instance, I am faced with more than one direction that I am able to take in my work. I can also see that my talents and skills will fit in any direction that I choose. Now being aware of this makes me go into freezemode right away. And I leave it just there, I don’t investigate or search for what is best to do while the answer is right in front of me.
The point I missed and that leads me to an answer as a certain and clear decision, is to give myself all context; everything and all that is involved. What I can do in this situation is;
- to take everything in consideration
- to take the people that are involved in my life in consideration
- to look at the possibilities and probabilities
- to see when and if I go this or that way, what will be best?
Instead of gifting this to myself, I just go into a reaction immediately. And thus,
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to react in fear by going into freezemode when faced with having to make a decision.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to panic in fear when I am faced with more than one opportunities within my work.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realized and understand that the answer is right in front of me, in this case a decision that I can be clear on.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not take the responsibility to direct myself out of my freezemode and instead, leave myself hanging in there for a while.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to let fear control me and to not change this in real-time when being aware of this fear.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not gift myself the context of all and everything that is involved and that will lead me into an answer that is a clear decision.
When and as I am aware of me going into fear/freezemode when faced with having to make a decision, i stop and I breath. I realize that the answer is right in front of me and so I commit myself to give myself full context of everything and all that is/are involved in the situation so I can make a clear decision.
I can recommend this interview with support on having to make a decision;